The 5 Part Process to Networking Effectively - From the Archive

Enjoy. All right, let's talk about networking. That is one of the most annoying buzzwords in the business world. Nobody wants to be a networker, or nobody I know at least, nobody I like wants to be a networker, right? When we think of networker, I see schmoozing, suit wearing, kind of like fake complimenting, business card handing outer, you know, loves to be at a conference and just, you know, believes that the only way to send an email is to shoot it your way, right? So, nobody wants to be a networker, but everybody wants a badass network, and you've probably heard the phrase, "Your network is your net worth," and it's not true, but there's some truth in it, like all clichés, and so, you know, I wanted to tell you about kind of the way I think about this stuff, and I used to have this thing, I wrote, I half wrote a book, like 10 years ago, of all the things I had learned my first year doing a startup. And I never published it, maybe I should someday. These are, it's turning now into, I guess, podcasts like this or my newsletter. Go to SeanPerry.com, you should be subscribing. That's where I put out stories like this. But anyhow, the phrase I used was, I said networking is like Noah's Ark, right? You know, the old fabled story of Noah's Ark. So here's kind of how it's like Noah's Ark. You have the flood, and I would say for most business— most startup businesses, just assume the flood is coming, right? For a startup, by default, you're gonna fail. You have to like do something to get out of failure into success. And so the flood is coming, and your network is your best chance of surviving, because within your network you're gonna find knowledge, expertise, capital, strategy, different things that you're gonna need in order to survive. Okay, number 2, build it before you need it. So you don't want to try to build your network when you need a network, right? If you want to fundraise, that's not the time to build your connections with investors. It's, it's too late at that point, and it's very transparent. Exactly what you're doing is very transactional, so you don't build a real network, you don't build real relationships. And so you want to be placing deposits into those bank accounts months or years before you ever are trying to make a withdrawal. And so that's why build it before you need it, and you want to build it with the intention of it being mutually beneficial, right? You want to be depositing so that they have something in their, their account from you. You're giving before you're gonna end up asking for something. Number 3: keep it kosher. So, you know, in the story of Noah's Ark, God, you know, granted Noah and his followers the right to kill some of the animals and eat their meat, but, you know, it had to be done in a certain way. And it's the same principle with your network. You wanna use but don't abuse your network. Everybody hates that guy who's just constantly asking and constantly using the network rather than it being a true friendship or sort of allyship where we'll help each other out. And we'll know where the line is where you're asking for too much. Okay, number 4, you want 2 of everything. So what I do when I build a network, and this is, I've never heard anyone else talk about this, but it's, it's made common sense to me, and I think you should do it too, is you want to pair up every member in your network with another. So often when you're networking, you're going to people that are, let's say, more successful, more knowledgeable, more connected than you. That's very frequently the case. And so that creates the potential for kind of a one-way dynamic, right? And you got to think, why would this, why would this person on the other side, and If I know why I would want to be connected with them, because they're smart and they're experienced and they have capital and they have connections, why do they wanna connect with me? Well, first, have some confidence. They wanna connect with you 'cause you're an interesting person doing interesting things, that you're fun to be around, that you're kind and you will help them, you know, without them even needing to ask. But the second thing is, when you're building a network, you don't want them all just to be connected to you. You want them to be connected to each other. Right, so when I meet somebody and I have 2 people in my network, I raced to introduce those 2 dots to each other, right? I want them to connect with each other. And now I've added value to both of them just by connecting them with each other. So that's how you want 2 of everything, just like Noah had 2 of every animal on the ark. And by the way, I used to feel this weird sense of like, I don't know, jealousy, 'cause I would introduce 2 people that were in my network and all of a sudden they would become best friends and they would do business together and often they wouldn't even be including me in that stuff. And I used to think, "Oh man, maybe I should be trying to keep everybody to myself." But obviously that's a naive, short-sighted way of thinking about it. It's a natural human reaction, but it's not the right response. The right response is to say, "Hell yeah, I want all the people around me to be winning and I have so much abundance in my life of of connections, of all this stuff, you know, I couldn't even use anymore. My cup is overflowing. And so if they're having a great time together, they're doing business together, fantastic. That's a win for me. Those are two people in my network who are winning because I was able to connect those dots. And the last piece, number 5, do the work. Building the ark was a lot of work, and you got to do the work yourself. You got to Google stock everybody. You got to find common ground. You got to make time. If they like hiking, then you better lace them up and you better meet them on the trail at 6:00 AM, right? Don't be lazy and don't suggest generic coffee meetings and that stuff. This is more like dating. It's courtship, right? You gotta figure out what the other person's into. You gotta speak their language and you gotta help them out. And you're not doing it just to schmooze with them, right? You're doing it because that's just the decent, friendly thing to do is to think about what the other person's interested in and try to meet them where they are. And so if you want to build a great network, you got to do those 5 things. Let's recap them. Prepare for the flood. Number 2, build it before you need it. Number 3, keep it kosher. Don't, don't, you know, use but don't abuse your network. Number 4, get 2 of everything. Pair your people in your network to each other. Everyone who you meet, you should introduce to another person in your network. And number 5, do the work. Don't be lazy. And so yeah, networking, it could be schmoozing if you're sort of talentedless, if you're sort of talentless or callous about the way you go about it. But I think it's different. It's maximizing one of the most valuable resources around you, the people that are in your orbit. And it's a renewable resource. It's in your control. You're able to build it, and it's sort of the gift that keeps on giving once you build it. So that's it, Noah's Ark for networking. If you like this little story, you should sign up for my newsletter. I put out stories like this once or twice a week. I do a lot more of these written than I do in audio. So if you like this stuff, you should join. It's just my name, SeanPuri.com, and go sign up. I think there's like 30,000 people on there now. We want to get that to 100,000 by the end of the year. All right, enjoy.